"Wow that's weird they have an odd number of seating."
Everyone at the table scoots over. The conversations continue. The room is filled with laughter and deep voices regaling stories of travel and work. A chair is brought over to the table. Now everyone has a place.
But there were six seats. How is that odd? Easy, I sat down.
I attended a holiday dinner for my companies project. Almost all in attendance brought their spouses. Those who didn't, their spouses couldn't make it. Except for me. I had no significant other, boyfriend...nothing, but me.
I was excited to go. Those who know me know that the prospect of free food always gets me excited. Hey what can I say. I'm easy to please.
As the date inched closer I began to feel uneasy. I'm relatively new, dont say more than two words in passing to these people and well it would be all couples.
Don't fret I'm used to being the single woman out. And well, it was free food. I'll look good. I'll go, I'll mingle, I'll have fun and - did I mention free food?
I sat at a table with two other couples and low and behold another walks over. "Thats odd only one chair."
No one even realized that the single girl sat there and threw it off, well until I told them.
Sometimes though I feel this society is so geared towards couples and families, that you are not truly accepted until you "join the club."
It can become hard to enjoy the season you are in when the world tells you "You're in the wrong season!"
The older I have gotten the less things bother me. I walked into that room with myself. And I had a ball, and when their weren't enough chairs because I threw off the count, well someone just pulled up one and everything was okay.
And guess what? Being single is okay.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Monday, December 10, 2007
My Dating Shero - Have Fun
I have a friend whose date calendar is full. I mean FULL. She is going on dates left and right. Five to Seven a week. So many she sometimes has to cancel. My jaw drops in awe and envy. This woman is on a mission.
Mission: Date by Christmas
If you choose to accept you will have to date like a madwoman. You may meet jerks. You may meet friends. You may meet a man you're interested in. This message will self destruct in three, two, one...
BAM!!!
Okay so I ask my friend, "Damn girl how are you getting all these dates?"
"The internet."
A simple answer. However, that was not good enough for me. Especially since her answer was nothing short of what I was doing. "Well hell I'm on the internet too."
"Well I just decided to have fun."
I paused for a moment to chew that over 'have fun' "Wait, have fun. You mean you've lowered your standards."
"Well,yeah. You can't meet a men, get married, or anything if you don't date."
Roight, Roight. She did have a point there. 'have fun' kept echoing in my mind. What a novel idea. She decides to let go and just have fun and she has dates left and right. Here I am with requirements and nothing to post on my blog.
Have fun
I think I'll try that.
P.S. - She did say she wasn't dropping her height requirement. And by golly neither will I!
Mission: Date by Christmas
If you choose to accept you will have to date like a madwoman. You may meet jerks. You may meet friends. You may meet a man you're interested in. This message will self destruct in three, two, one...
BAM!!!
Okay so I ask my friend, "Damn girl how are you getting all these dates?"
"The internet."
A simple answer. However, that was not good enough for me. Especially since her answer was nothing short of what I was doing. "Well hell I'm on the internet too."
"Well I just decided to have fun."
I paused for a moment to chew that over 'have fun' "Wait, have fun. You mean you've lowered your standards."
"Well,yeah. You can't meet a men, get married, or anything if you don't date."
Roight, Roight. She did have a point there. 'have fun' kept echoing in my mind. What a novel idea. She decides to let go and just have fun and she has dates left and right. Here I am with requirements and nothing to post on my blog.
Have fun
I think I'll try that.
P.S. - She did say she wasn't dropping her height requirement. And by golly neither will I!
Saturday, December 8, 2007
My "type" - Tall and Geeky
I have a "type" just like everyone else. And the "type" I'm talking about is purely physical.
I like a tall man. Not fat (don't want to look like '00' walking down the street) and not skinny (don't want to look like a '10' walking down the street). Let me rephrase I LOVE a tall man. Nothing will make me cross my legs and clench my thighs quicker than seeing a tall man who smells good. Hold on need a moment...
Okay I'm back. What was I saying? Oh yeah my type. I don't particularly like men with hair. I really don't like men with hair longer than mine. I prefer bald, but low cut will do just as nicely. But no locks, no twists, no braids, no cornrows, no ponytail...no length.
Recently added to the list is smooth dark chocolate skin. Oooh wee. *wiping drool*
Facial hair is fine, as long as its neat and trimmed. Actually well groomed facial hair ...sorry needed a moment to myself.
Put it all together, a tall man that smells good with little to no hair and smooth Hershey's skin.
How many men have I dated that fits the profile? NONE *Big Sigh* Apparently I'll only get him in my dreams.
In fact (boy I hate to admit this) 99% of men I have dated have, I was not physically attracted to.
Now here is my rule of physical attraction. As long as your like a 5 or above (on a scale of 1-10), I'll go out with you. A 5 in looks with an 8 in personality will make him EASILY a 7. My exception, a short man. For some reason I cannot find it in me to think of them as more than friends no matter how hard I try. I'm all about giving it that old college try. I mean who really marries an Adonis. But we all have our thing.
Now the other "type" I just recently discovered.
I like a Geek. You know the "computer guy" whose also into video games, comics, or something just as geeky/lame/childish/weird. He tends to watch alot of Sci-Fi and/or Fantasy movies. Can quote movies. Extremely smart, well versed. Full of tidbits of information.
Now how many men have I dated that fits this mold?
99%
Who knew I was into Poindexter.
I like a tall man. Not fat (don't want to look like '00' walking down the street) and not skinny (don't want to look like a '10' walking down the street). Let me rephrase I LOVE a tall man. Nothing will make me cross my legs and clench my thighs quicker than seeing a tall man who smells good. Hold on need a moment...
Okay I'm back. What was I saying? Oh yeah my type. I don't particularly like men with hair. I really don't like men with hair longer than mine. I prefer bald, but low cut will do just as nicely. But no locks, no twists, no braids, no cornrows, no ponytail...no length.
Recently added to the list is smooth dark chocolate skin. Oooh wee. *wiping drool*
Facial hair is fine, as long as its neat and trimmed. Actually well groomed facial hair ...sorry needed a moment to myself.
Put it all together, a tall man that smells good with little to no hair and smooth Hershey's skin.
How many men have I dated that fits the profile? NONE *Big Sigh* Apparently I'll only get him in my dreams.
In fact (boy I hate to admit this) 99% of men I have dated have, I was not physically attracted to.
Now here is my rule of physical attraction. As long as your like a 5 or above (on a scale of 1-10), I'll go out with you. A 5 in looks with an 8 in personality will make him EASILY a 7. My exception, a short man. For some reason I cannot find it in me to think of them as more than friends no matter how hard I try. I'm all about giving it that old college try. I mean who really marries an Adonis. But we all have our thing.
Now the other "type" I just recently discovered.
I like a Geek. You know the "computer guy" whose also into video games, comics, or something just as geeky/lame/childish/weird. He tends to watch alot of Sci-Fi and/or Fantasy movies. Can quote movies. Extremely smart, well versed. Full of tidbits of information.
Now how many men have I dated that fits this mold?
99%
Who knew I was into Poindexter.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Finding and keeping a life partner
So as in the world of email we tend to get forwards a thousand times over. Here is one dealing with relationships that a married co-worker sent to me with her insight on it. I thought it was cool so I am posting it here, as it seems pretty appropriate. (I mean this is a dating/relationship, or lack thereof, blog).
A relationship coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the prospects of long-term marital success. When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50 percent, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr. /Ms. Right.
If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love." I believe this is the 1 mistake people make when dating. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound politically incorrect, but there's a profound truth here.
Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the othe r ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone. You need a lot more. Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.
QUESTION 1: Do we share a common life purpose?
* Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: hopefully you are anticipating to be married for 20 or 30+ years, that is a long time to live with someone.
* What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? Well that will get you through the first month. And you will definitely need to share something deeper and more meaningful to get thorough the next 30+ years; you need a common life purpose.
Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can grow apart. 50 percent of the people are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life, and to marry someone who wants similar goals.
QUESTION 2: Do I feel safe/free expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. Ask yourself?
* Am I willing to allow my partner to equally express him/herself with the same exceptions you desire; honest, open, without fear of rejection, judgments or retaliation?
* Can I have conversations without belittling their thoughts and expressions, and they yours.
* Do you and your potential partner understand the difference between listening and hearing?
The basics of having good communication is trust -i.e. trust that I won't get "punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. One trait of an abusive person is someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings with. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel and can be emotionally safe with and for the person you plan to marry.
There are two key factors within marriage that you can't live without these are Communication, and trust. I know you though I was going to say Love, but love grows and develops, without communication or trust nothing can grow but resentment and bitterness.
QUESTION 3: Does he/she show self centered or materialistic tendencies?
How can you examine this? Here are some suggestions.
* What do they do with their time?
* Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement they have a preoccupation with or stress upon the material (giving/having real importance to the physical or worldly) rather than intellectual or spiritual things.
In conjunction
* Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis?
* Are they serious about improving themselves?
* Or how will they advance or have or posses a major obsession
A good person has been defined as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right thing." So consider the goals and aspirations of your significant other:
There are essentially two types of people in the world: People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.
QUESTION 4: How does he/she treat other people?
One of the most important things that make any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure. Marriage, like being parents, means self sacrifice. Ask yourself: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they self-absorbed and selfish? To measure this, think about the following:
* How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a waiters, bus boy, taxi driver, etc.
* How do they treat parents and siblings?
* Do they have gratitude and appreciation? If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything, how do you think they will treat you who have not done nearly as much for them!
* Do they gossip and speak badly about others? Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others. You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly will eventually treat you poorly as well.
FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER
QUESTION 5 : Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve" them after they're married. The best probability is that "You can expect someone to change after marriage...for the worse!" During the courtship period, everyone always puts their best foot forward. You will never go to a potential mate's home and see his underwear lying across the couch, the chair, or even on the floor. But, after you've said "I do", and without proper communication, you may find them anywhere. If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.
Dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. For example, you should ask yourself if this person never changes can you marry them as they are? Falling in love is a great natural high, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself sleeping with a total stranger because you didn't do your homework.
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of, or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention.
* Which ones lift and which ones lean?
* Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
* Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?
* When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?
* Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?
The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.
FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER
An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye." Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults isn't really that important. Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws, vulnerabilities, pet peeves and differences will become more obvious. And by all means don't say you can l ive with one of those pet peeves just to get to the ring/bed, because once that day is over, that peeve will not only be there but will be magnified.
If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn how to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses and strengths. You have two totally different backgrounds and upbringings. You are merging the instructions and teachings from two separate families. You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share a life together.
Neither one of you is perfect,
o But, hopefully, are you perfect for each other?
o Do you bring out the best in each other?
o Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare, manipulate, and try to control one another?
o What do you bring to the relationship? And again, I say
o What do you bring to the relationship?
o Do you bring past relationships, hurt, mistrust, or pain?
o Have you resolved your past issues and are you ready to move forward? If you cannot give a definite yes to this question, stop, drop that ring—you are not ready!
You can't take someone to the altar to alter him or her. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a prayer life" you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.
FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER
WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG:
1. TRUST
2. COMMUNICATION
3. INTIMACY
4. SENSE OF HUMOR
5. SHARING TASKS
6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN
7. DAILY EXCHANGES (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a note)
8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS
9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE
10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF& nbsp; COMMITMENT
And again I say
11 TRUST
12. COMMUNICATION , COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION
if any of these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty and pain will replace the passion.
A relationship coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the prospects of long-term marital success. When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50 percent, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr. /Ms. Right.
If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love." I believe this is the 1 mistake people make when dating. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound politically incorrect, but there's a profound truth here.
Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the othe r ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone. You need a lot more. Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.
QUESTION 1: Do we share a common life purpose?
* Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: hopefully you are anticipating to be married for 20 or 30+ years, that is a long time to live with someone.
* What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? Well that will get you through the first month. And you will definitely need to share something deeper and more meaningful to get thorough the next 30+ years; you need a common life purpose.
Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can grow apart. 50 percent of the people are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life, and to marry someone who wants similar goals.
QUESTION 2: Do I feel safe/free expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. Ask yourself?
* Am I willing to allow my partner to equally express him/herself with the same exceptions you desire; honest, open, without fear of rejection, judgments or retaliation?
* Can I have conversations without belittling their thoughts and expressions, and they yours.
* Do you and your potential partner understand the difference between listening and hearing?
The basics of having good communication is trust -i.e. trust that I won't get "punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. One trait of an abusive person is someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings with. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel and can be emotionally safe with and for the person you plan to marry.
There are two key factors within marriage that you can't live without these are Communication, and trust. I know you though I was going to say Love, but love grows and develops, without communication or trust nothing can grow but resentment and bitterness.
QUESTION 3: Does he/she show self centered or materialistic tendencies?
How can you examine this? Here are some suggestions.
* What do they do with their time?
* Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement they have a preoccupation with or stress upon the material (giving/having real importance to the physical or worldly) rather than intellectual or spiritual things.
In conjunction
* Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis?
* Are they serious about improving themselves?
* Or how will they advance or have or posses a major obsession
A good person has been defined as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right thing." So consider the goals and aspirations of your significant other:
There are essentially two types of people in the world: People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.
QUESTION 4: How does he/she treat other people?
One of the most important things that make any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure. Marriage, like being parents, means self sacrifice. Ask yourself: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they self-absorbed and selfish? To measure this, think about the following:
* How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a waiters, bus boy, taxi driver, etc.
* How do they treat parents and siblings?
* Do they have gratitude and appreciation? If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything, how do you think they will treat you who have not done nearly as much for them!
* Do they gossip and speak badly about others? Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others. You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly will eventually treat you poorly as well.
FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER
QUESTION 5 : Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve" them after they're married. The best probability is that "You can expect someone to change after marriage...for the worse!" During the courtship period, everyone always puts their best foot forward. You will never go to a potential mate's home and see his underwear lying across the couch, the chair, or even on the floor. But, after you've said "I do", and without proper communication, you may find them anywhere. If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.
Dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. For example, you should ask yourself if this person never changes can you marry them as they are? Falling in love is a great natural high, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself sleeping with a total stranger because you didn't do your homework.
There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of, or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention.
* Which ones lift and which ones lean?
* Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
* Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?
* When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?
* Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?
The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.
FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER
An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye." Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults isn't really that important. Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws, vulnerabilities, pet peeves and differences will become more obvious. And by all means don't say you can l ive with one of those pet peeves just to get to the ring/bed, because once that day is over, that peeve will not only be there but will be magnified.
If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn how to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses and strengths. You have two totally different backgrounds and upbringings. You are merging the instructions and teachings from two separate families. You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share a life together.
Neither one of you is perfect,
o But, hopefully, are you perfect for each other?
o Do you bring out the best in each other?
o Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare, manipulate, and try to control one another?
o What do you bring to the relationship? And again, I say
o What do you bring to the relationship?
o Do you bring past relationships, hurt, mistrust, or pain?
o Have you resolved your past issues and are you ready to move forward? If you cannot give a definite yes to this question, stop, drop that ring—you are not ready!
You can't take someone to the altar to alter him or her. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a prayer life" you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.
FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER
WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG:
1. TRUST
2. COMMUNICATION
3. INTIMACY
4. SENSE OF HUMOR
5. SHARING TASKS
6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN
7. DAILY EXCHANGES (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a note)
8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS
9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE
10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF& nbsp; COMMITMENT
And again I say
11 TRUST
12. COMMUNICATION , COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION
if any of these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty and pain will replace the passion.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
I think I used to be Ghetto
Sooo I am going through old pictures of me and I remembered a time when I had red hair.
Actually I have been a honey blond, red head, purple hair, dark brown, blackish, as well as streaks of red, brown, and honey blond all at the same time (dont worry this one only lasted on week). But my red hair stayed the longest. I think i was a red head for about two years. As I was looking at the pictures I thought "Damn I didn't realize it was that pronounced." Was I a ghetto girl? I decided to take you back down memory lane with me.
Here are the pics.
Yup that's red.
Fried dyed, and laid to the side
Yes I know I was sporting a unibrow. I hadn't made it to get them waxed yet.
And for a bonus here are a couple from my weavariffic days.
Actually I have been a honey blond, red head, purple hair, dark brown, blackish, as well as streaks of red, brown, and honey blond all at the same time (dont worry this one only lasted on week). But my red hair stayed the longest. I think i was a red head for about two years. As I was looking at the pictures I thought "Damn I didn't realize it was that pronounced." Was I a ghetto girl? I decided to take you back down memory lane with me.
Here are the pics.
Yup that's red.
Fried dyed, and laid to the side
Yes I know I was sporting a unibrow. I hadn't made it to get them waxed yet.
And for a bonus here are a couple from my weavariffic days.
Batch of Updates and Story Morals
Well guys its been a long time since posting things have been crazy.
* My new job is still whooping my ass
* I'm still single
* Since my last update I turned 30. And I purchased my first house.
* I have been dealing with family medical issues as well as my own.
* Tomorrow starts operation 'Date before Christmas' I will begin my search with a vengeance. I'll let you know how that goes.
* Okay I first let me start out by saying that sometimes I get bored and type in various peoples name in Google just to see what happens. I know I'm not the only one who does it. I will type in names from back in high school, grammar school, old friends, old beaus, old people, just whatever. I am still amazed at the power of Google.
So one name led to another which led to another and I looked up a flame from way back in the day. (I started at high school looking up folks then I got to college. It was a natural progression). I found his name on this cheaters site and thought "I knew he looked familiar."
Now lets back up about a year or so ago. You guys know that alot of my dating comes from online. Seems to be the common thing now. One day this guy sends me an email. We will call him Johnathan Monroe. So I check out Johnathan Monroes picture and go "Damn he looks like Joe Long that I used to date" Joe Long was NOT a good person (normal young stuff - cheating, lost my best friend, yada yada ya). Now Johnathan Monroe was THE type of man, physically, that I like. We dialogged back and forth and I asked/told him that he looked familiar.
We continued with our email exchange. I asked if he knew him (like was that his cousin) Johnathan was like, no. But the guy did look familiar, BUT I also have a "type," so...whatever. Y'all know I am bad at pointing out and describing people (My friends and I often joke that if their life depended on me being able to describe them to a sketch artist, they would be screwed.)
At any rate it was no big deal. The guy did look familiar, but he was from someplace completely different and had a different name. And if in the RARE event it was JL, I would figure it out once we met or we would never meet. Either way no skin off my back. Well we never met.
A year and a half later I am surfing the net and see his name and picture as well as his alias of Johnathan Monroe on a cheaters website. And I thought "I was right, he DID look familiar." As I read his charges the profile fit him to a T, down to even his profession and type of women. Then I felt sad for him. Its a shame he hasn't grown up yet. Same stuff from ten years ago. I guess some people never change.
There are two morals to this story.
1. I need to start taking Ginseng.
2. Life is about change and growth. Learning who you are and trying to be a better person. Love yourself, Love the Lord, and Love and respect others. As we grow older we grow wiser (at least one would hope). What are you doing with that wisdom. Are you growing, are you helping others grow, or are you using it to take advantage of other people.
Think back ten years ago. Take away your job, your financial situation, and everything material. How are you different? Are you different? How do you feel you have grown and matured? What life lessons have you learned?
* My new job is still whooping my ass
* I'm still single
* Since my last update I turned 30. And I purchased my first house.
* I have been dealing with family medical issues as well as my own.
* Tomorrow starts operation 'Date before Christmas' I will begin my search with a vengeance. I'll let you know how that goes.
* Okay I first let me start out by saying that sometimes I get bored and type in various peoples name in Google just to see what happens. I know I'm not the only one who does it. I will type in names from back in high school, grammar school, old friends, old beaus, old people, just whatever. I am still amazed at the power of Google.
So one name led to another which led to another and I looked up a flame from way back in the day. (I started at high school looking up folks then I got to college. It was a natural progression). I found his name on this cheaters site and thought "I knew he looked familiar."
Now lets back up about a year or so ago. You guys know that alot of my dating comes from online. Seems to be the common thing now. One day this guy sends me an email. We will call him Johnathan Monroe. So I check out Johnathan Monroes picture and go "Damn he looks like Joe Long that I used to date" Joe Long was NOT a good person (normal young stuff - cheating, lost my best friend, yada yada ya). Now Johnathan Monroe was THE type of man, physically, that I like. We dialogged back and forth and I asked/told him that he looked familiar.
We continued with our email exchange. I asked if he knew him (like was that his cousin) Johnathan was like, no. But the guy did look familiar, BUT I also have a "type," so...whatever. Y'all know I am bad at pointing out and describing people (My friends and I often joke that if their life depended on me being able to describe them to a sketch artist, they would be screwed.)
At any rate it was no big deal. The guy did look familiar, but he was from someplace completely different and had a different name. And if in the RARE event it was JL, I would figure it out once we met or we would never meet. Either way no skin off my back. Well we never met.
A year and a half later I am surfing the net and see his name and picture as well as his alias of Johnathan Monroe on a cheaters website. And I thought "I was right, he DID look familiar." As I read his charges the profile fit him to a T, down to even his profession and type of women. Then I felt sad for him. Its a shame he hasn't grown up yet. Same stuff from ten years ago. I guess some people never change.
There are two morals to this story.
1. I need to start taking Ginseng.
2. Life is about change and growth. Learning who you are and trying to be a better person. Love yourself, Love the Lord, and Love and respect others. As we grow older we grow wiser (at least one would hope). What are you doing with that wisdom. Are you growing, are you helping others grow, or are you using it to take advantage of other people.
Think back ten years ago. Take away your job, your financial situation, and everything material. How are you different? Are you different? How do you feel you have grown and matured? What life lessons have you learned?
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