Friday, February 9, 2007

Two Deadliest STD's in the black Community pt. I

I know everyone knows what the first on is. But let me break down the two STD's that are hurting and killing us as a community. The saddest part is these diseases are 100% preventable.

AIDS
KIDS

Yeah I know I'm wrong, I listed kids as an STD...and they are. Shit I don't know if I'm more afraid of getting AIDS or KIDS. I don't believe in having living things in my place, that's why I don't even have a plant. But I digress. This is not to say that I don't want to have a family - a husband and children. But notice what I have said HUSBAND.We have alot of children out here being raised by one parent. Before I go into my tyraide I am NOT talking to people who were married and got divorced. Hell sometimes shit doesn't work out. But you gave it that ole college try.What I am talking about are the "accidents" that come when you don't protect yourself. AGAIN, I am not talking about ACCIDENTS that occur when you are in a committed relationship. That is different (I say committed cause you maybe like Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. They are in a serious committed relationship, but are NOT married. To each his own.)When you lay down with dogs, you wake up with fleas...or a disease.Who really suffers when all your child has is a sperm donor or a "baby daddy". The kid. And yes, yes I know you're doing the best you can, but dammit its not good enough. You're not supposed to do it alone. (Please see above for who I'm not talking to). One condom, one solution, one prevention. There is some atrocious number of black children being raised by single parents (I know it was over 60% I think it was over 80%). This hurts us as a community.I met a woman who once said to me "My children have the same father, that's all I ever wanted...for my kids to have the same last name."WOW!!! I think that speaks wonders. What the hell kind of goal is that?I'm going to quote Chris Rock on this folks always want credit for stuff they are SUPPOSED to do. (Again, I am not talking to those who remarried and our nuclear and extended families). Have our priorities and what we except gotten so low that given birth to kids by the same man is the biggest accomplishment we can come up with.Who is thinking of our children?If there is "baby daddy" and "baby mama" drama, then there is some kid stuck in the middle of it absorbing it all.I have many friends who are single with no kids (Can I get an applause please). Do you know what kind of hell they get for that. "Why don't you have any kids."Their response is usually "I'm not married" or some variation thereof. They get talked about like a DOG. "Oh well you're just selfish. That's just selfish of you not to have kids." "Don't you think about anyone outside of yourself."I am not talking about isolated incidents. I am talking about a consistent badgering for making a choice not to have children. (and therefore no baby daddy or baby daddy "drama")I think it was selfless. To make the decision that I want my child to benefit from two parents (even if in the end it doesn't work out). I want to be able to provide my child with loving home without drama (again before you beat up on me I know originaly intention and end result are not always the same. I am speaking of original intention).What's really a shame is that I have to have all of these parenthesis in here because I know this is a "controversial" topic. But hell we need to talk about it. I'm not saying don't have sex (Though it is the 100% way to not get a disease). I am saying be smart about it. Protect yourself. Think and be safe in everything you do, because you may not be the only person to pay for your one night stand. Or you on again off again 'relationship'. You may not be the only one to pay for your bad desicions. (And Lord knows we are ALL guilty of making bad decisions).Our children are our futureWhat kind of future are we really headed for? Stop the cycle, break the pattern, make a real future.So yes I stand by my original quote protect yourself cause you may get a KID. They are an emotional, finiancial, and physical stress (and yes I know they are a blessing, but I'm being real and honest). If you cannot handle that and are not ready for that...alone, then protect yourself.

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